Debunking Marriage Myths (3)

Marriage myth 3: The myth of 'the full box,' suggests that when we marry we inherit a big box filled with self-replacing good things, guaranteeing effortless unending marital bliss. This box is supposed to contain romance, physical fulfilment, generosity, true love, and being served 'in the style to which we've become accustomed.' Ideally, we can dip in and take what we want from a never-depleted supply. Instant, low-maintenance satisfaction guaranteed! And it seems to work initially, so we believe the myth. Until one rainy day we dip into the box and come up empty. At that point we feel shock, disappointment, anger, despair and hopelessness and conclude that our partner failed, fooled or forsook us.

Why else would the box be empty? At that point the myth suggests, 'It's time to find another box!' Or you could listen to the liberating truth: a) marriage is a big box, an empty one. Your job is to make enough deposits to guarantee sufficient withdrawals for a rich relationship. Jesus said: '… The amount you give will determine the amount you get back' (Luke 6:38 NLT) b) you must start by asking, 'What would I like to have in the box?' Then you deposit that into the box. Then you ask, 'How much of it do I want in the box?' Then you deposit enough to generate that amount. You see, the box is only a container; it didn't fail and you didn't get a bad box. You are the owner of the box, not its victim. Accepting this truth frees you to make your marriage rich and rewarding by becoming a giver, not just a taker!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Why Did I Get Married?

Things That Irritate Me

Two Cultures, One Marriage, No Big Deal