Ladies' Affairs

By Bunmi Diya

A lady is a woman that is of good manners, highly matured in conducts and of course with a refined disposition. According to the Oxford dictionary, it defines “…a lady as a word used to mean WOMAN that some people especially older people consider as more polite”. It also defines a lady as “a woman who is polite and well-educated, has excellent manners and always behave well”.

Contrary to the definition, it is sad to understand that some ladies don’t even have the grace to be women. They are too loud and ill-mannered to be reckoned with. Some ladies’ mode of dressing, eating, sitting, talking and even laughing is so poor and makes one feel disappointed. We should always remember that we are what we portray ourselves to be. We should show more refinement than an ordinary woman on the street.


A lady needs to carry herself with dignity. She needs to be wise and sharp. She should be bold and confident. She should try and lead a peaceful life. We need to be level-headed and classic. We also need to make ourselves indispensable in any place we find ourselves. An ideal lady needs to have a good sense of decorum; she needs to observe etiquette when occasion calls for; she needs to have a good charisma coupled with an embracing and admirable mannerism. Women should remember also that having a good carriage too will boost their personalities. These are all lady-like qualities that makes, if not a complete but a nearly perfect lady.


For the fact that ladies are seen to be flexible in nature does not guarantee or warrant them to behave flexibly, believe stupidly and be a shallow thinker. Instead, they should be agile, willing to take risks, and prove especially impressive. They shouldn’t look down on themselves. They should understand that they need to be heard and felt, wherever they are. It gives one a sense of belonging. It is so unfortunate to find out that most ladies don’t see themselves as being competent enough to be among people that make things happen. They believe it is men’s world, due to the challenging or perhaps difficult roles or tasks that most men undergo. They assume that some of the daunting tasks should be handled by their male counter-parts probably due to their lack of self-confidence, poor self assessment, inferiority complex, lack of will-power or primarily due to some traditional beliefs and practices, such as: Women being a full house wife and inability or limitation to contribute to some important issues around her. This ought not to be. I would want to condemn the system as being archaic, unfair and needs changing.


I want to encourage us to carve a niche for ourselves and to stand up to the tasks ahead of us by collectively participating in our nation building; finding ways to explore every opportunity and adding our own quotas. By that, we would make ourselves relevant and productive. Evidently, a lot of women are into politics. If they are not audacious, they are not going to be there. Some are in the financial sector with a formidable list of qualifications and are highly efficient. In the multinational companies and other prestigious corporations, they are obviously not left out. This should deeply motivate us and stand as a benchmark against which any other involvements or participation could be measured.


Besides, we should take into cognisance that our physical beauty should not be the only commendation we get; but far more than that, is our internal beauty which should always radiate in us either consciously or sub-consciously. It is the utmost. Some of the internal qualities are: patience, gentility, diligence, wisdom, humility, kindness, caring, submissiveness (as in a marriage), endurance, love, generosity etc.

Therefore, ladies, without mincing words together, I believe we are all charged up to take the bull by the horn without more ado. I assume that we are not just going to fold our hands and watch what is happening all around us like a spectator but with drive and passion, we should turn a new leaf and make ourselves useful in our time.


  1. i agree with your definition of ladies,but many lacks these factors

  2. Yeah....a lot lack the factors. But I'm sure some good ones are working towards getting there. It really is not easy as no one is perfect. But with hardwork and dedication....


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